Deepening Grief

Maya Institute: Cultivating Compassion in Health Care

Published: January 9 · 

It has not been two weeks since my momma’s passing, and my pappa has declined significantly. His physical capabilities are drastically changed… he can hardly walk a block without complete exhaustion and shortness of breath. His dementia has deepened, such that even simple tasks are now complicated for him. His rapid decline is reaching my core and deepens my grieving even further.

As we made our efforts to reach West Palm Beach (WPB) yesterday, the entire way I wondered whether he was capable of such a trip. It took every effort I had to get him here safely. While the sun and warm weather are good for us both, his limited capacity and his frailty brings up so much anguish. I have not begun to process all the suffering my momma experienced, and now I must step into this next phase with pappa.

My grief needs to be released and healed and it is as if the universe is testing the limits of my heart, my soul, and my capacity. I know that I have immense capacity for love and compassion, and that I will support him the best I can as he makes his journey. I expected this…his decline… just not so quickly.

I need some space and time to breathe, so every moment here in the sun and on the beach will have to replenish me. May we find the strength to love in every moment.💜🕉💜